Surprised by Christmas – “Family Lessons” 

The Christmas story is full of memorable characters: the shepherds, wise men, animals and angels, not to mention the main characters, Mary and Jesus. But as we consider that story as parents, perhaps we should look closely at Joseph, the quiet, faithful “underdog” who followed his calling.

1.  A Challenge (Matthew 1:18-19)

•  When Joseph got the news that no man wants to hear – that his fiancé was pregnant and the baby wasn’t his – his options were limited. He didn’t (yet) believe that the pregnancy was miraculous, but he was a “righteous” man and wanted to do the right thing, willing to endure loss and less to do so. 
• Joseph’s response was exactly the calling we have in parenting: to endure, to some degree, the loss of what we want – and getting by with a little bit less – so that we can ensure that “another person” has what they need. Parenting is hard; it’s not because kids are “bad,” but because it exposes us as human beings – our weaknesses, our selfishness, our fears and our uncertainties.
• Like a difficult jigsaw puzzle, we face the parenting task with an image in our minds of what the completed “picture” should look like. Then the real challenge begins, as we struggle to find and link pieces that sometimes seem to have little connection to the beautiful picture we imagined when we began. The task becomes even more difficult if there is a piece or two missing from the box…
• Parenting can reveal the gaps in our character and in our families – the missing pieces. But that doesn’t have to be the end of the story or the end of the beautiful picture. Through the power of God, working through the Spirit of Jesus in our lives, we can begin to fill the gaps to become the person – and the parent – God meant for us to be.

2. A Dream  (Matthew 1:20-23) some text
   • We all enter marriage and parenthood with a dream of what it will be like and how it will play out. But Joseph was given another dream, when the angel came to him and told him that he’d been tasked by God to give up his own dream for another purpose – the greatest purpose his life could have.
   • One of the biggest challenges of parenting is recognizing that our (personal) dreams for our kids often have to give way to their dreams – and, more importantly, to God’s “dreams” (i.e., his calling) – for their lives. Our task as parents is to help them find and pursue their purpose and calling from God.
3. A Name (Matthew 1:24, 25b) some text
   •  God, through his angel, gave Joseph essentially one job to do: assume the role of father to Mary’s child and name him “Jesus.” It would be difficult, complicated and occasionally painful, but that was his essential task for the rest of his life – his calling and his God-given mission.
   • As parents, we have dozens of roles in our children’s lives: teacher, counselor, coach, driver, Scout leader, etc. But the one job that’s most important – the job we can do like no one else can – is to lead them to Jesus. It’s our #1 calling as parents – to help our kids meet him, and ideally to trust him.

ADDITIONAL SCRIPTURE

These passages may provide additional insights related to the subject of this week’s message. All verses are NLT unless otherwise noted.

Deuteronomy 6:4-7; Psalm 127:3-5; Proverbs 22:6; Jeremiah 29:11; 1 Peter 2:9

Video of the Week: The Royal Priesthood by the Bible Project

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION AND DISCUSSION

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1. Other than Jesus, who’s your favorite character(s) from the Christmas story? Explain your answer. 

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2. Read Matthew 1:18-24 again. Do you believe that Joseph was a “hero” in the Christmas story, or did he just do what any man would have done under the circumstances?

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3. Joseph gave up a lot to assume the role of Jesus’s father, including his pride and probably his position in the community. How is Joseph’s sacrifice similar to how we’re called to endure “loss and less” for our children?  

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4. In your view, what are the biggest “missing pieces” (gaps in character) that most people have to overcome in order to be successful parents?  How can “the power of God working through…Jesus” make it possible to overcome those gaps?

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5. Do you think that parents should support and encourage any “dream” that their child has?  Why or why not?

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6. As Christian parents (and grandparents), our most important job is to introduce our kids to Jesus and (ideally) help them come to a place where they trust him with their lives. How, exactly, do we do that?

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